Hi, I'm a 21 tear old male, I'm not sure how long I've actually had rosacea now. At least a year, but looking at pictures two years ago I can now see that I actually had it then, just so little I didn't noticed. So I don't know really, but it's been clear it developed to become a problem about a year ago.

Anyway, I can't lie, the last year's been like hell, clearly the worst year of my life so far. My self-esteem is not what is used to be, I shy away from people, I'm constantly stressed and depressed and have even been suicidal(and still am sometimes). I saw one other guy post a thread here where he asked if anyone ever felt like "why me", and yes, I do all the time, but the worst part is realising that it's probably because of my bad lifestyle habits in the past that i got the condition: In my teen years I never had good sleeping habits and would stay up all night and wake up early for school. I was never active, I was eating pretty unhealthy for the most part and I was stressed very often.

In this short time of a year, I've had three lasers, tried antibiotics, tried eating healthy (and I still am), exercising, I never take hot showers anymore and avoid hot envorinments like the plague. I use sunscreen when it's sunny outside. I get enough sleep. In general I'm trying all the things that is known to maybe help... I can't honestly say I've followed these things perfectly; I have eaten unhealthy a few times, taken some hot showers, stopped exercising for a while, but in general I have followed these things and at this moment I follow all these things better than ever, for example I will never take a hot shower in my life anymore, because I know that means flare up for me.

At this moment I'm trying Finacea, and I was actually surprised and happy to see it working to a degree. I've used it for exactly two months now, and at least the pimples are very reduced which I'm glad to see, and also the redness to some degree(although I'm not that satisfied with the reduction in redness). People who are using/have tried Finacea: Can I expect much more improvement after the two months of use?

But, to the point of the thread: As I said I've tried all of the most common things that are known to help and I still got redness that is so bad it's almost unlivable to me.... when i get flare ups I just can't be around people and I think it's ruining my life, I know I'm not alone and this isn't me asking for sympathy, I'm asking this: I need advice, Finacea seems to help, but the redness isn't nearly where I would wish for it to be, and even though I have hopes for Finacea, I know I'm only fooling myself if I think it will help for certain - because that's not true... in fact I've come to realise that the redness could also get worse instead of better, even though I hate the thought of it, it's just how it is. So: If it doesn't get better, or just slightly better, what should I do?? I can't live with it, I just can't.... I know most people would just reply "well you have to" to that, but what should I do if it doesnt get better? I've gone trough a year, just ONE year with a condition that is chronic, and I've thought about killing myself in only that time, what should I do to survive with this condition if it doesn't get better or even gets worse? I feel hopeless, any advice would be appreciated. Thanks.